A couple approaches you, a pastor. They invite you to lunch to discuss matters of great importance to them. They are young, in love, and tell you three important truths. First, they profess to be Christians, members in good standing at a large evangelical church the next town over. Second, they affirm that they are currently living together. Along with that confession is a long list of reasons why- financial, logistical, etc. They admit that the Bible forbids them from living together. Third, they would like you to perform the wedding. What do you do?
Do you congratulate them on their plans, gently mention that they are quite right that the Bible forbids their living arrangements, but assure them that Christianity isn’t about a list of do’s and don’t’s, that their planned nuptials are what’s important and solves the problem? That Jesus died for all our sins, even the little, understandable ones.
Or, do you instead tell them that their three opening points are deeply troublesome? Do you let them know that God made Himself abundantly clear on the matter of fornication? Do you, as they rehearse all the reasons for their decision to live together tell them that they have made idols of the things they’ve seen as more important than God’s law? Do you tell them that they must end their living arrangements until they are actually married?
Or is there a third option? Would you tell them you cannot stay, and get up and leave? Would you, as they call out to you, asking where you are going, just keep going, maybe calling over your shoulder that you’ll have nothing to do with them?
What do you think? I’d argue that each of the first two options have elements in their favor. The Christian faith is not simply a list of rules, and Jesus did die for all our sins. Marriage is the end of fornication. Option two, however, has this added benefit. It gets to the heart of the matter, to the root that will remain if marriage solves the fornication problem. It addresses the real issue which is a perspective that suggests we can be wiser than God.
The third option seems cruel, harsh, arrogant even. Charges I’m sure many made against the Apostle Paul when he, under the inspiration of God the Holy Spirit, required option three for all of us.
I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner—not even to eat with such a person (I Corinthians 5:9-11).
That we reject this plain teaching when we know it well and good is of the same spirit as the young couple who were fornicating without repentance, knowing it was wrong. When we reject Paul’s admonition here it is no different, no better than rejecting his admonition here, “But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints” (Eph. 5:3).
Our fellowship is shaped by one rule- we are the people who repent. We fail often, of course. We battle besetting sins, including covetousness, idolatry, reviling, drunkenness and extortion. What we don’t do is surrender, while claiming allegiance to Jesus.
The lesson in the story is not about the young couple, nor about the pastor. It’s about you and me, and more importantly, about Jesus. We are, in ourselves, sinners. We all, sinfully, do what we know to be wrong. Wisdom means repentance, and knowing He is always right, and loving, Jesus received the judgment we are due. Our heavenly Father loves us infinitely, immutably and by name. May we all, even the redeemed, repent and believe the gospel.
