Thesis 40- We must be swift to repent to and in front of our children.
It is a difficult thing in our age for parents to swim against the cultural stream and actually lead in their homes. Our world has bought into the egalitarian lie that all of us have been given an equal amount of authority. Children and adults are at best seen as equals. Often its worst, with children portrayed as the fonts of wisdom, and parents portrayed as dottering fools. But God, the maker of the world, has determined that parents are to rule in their homes, that children are to obey their parents. That challenge is made all the more difficult by this glaring problem, parents are not just leaders in their homes, but are sinners in their homes.
Because there is so much cultural pushback against parents leading in their homes, sometimes parents face a peculiar temptation. If, we seem to fear, we admit our failures, admit our weaknesses, admit our sins, this will undermine our authority in the home. Better to pull rank, we sometimes think. Because we are listening to the devil on our shoulder, rather than the angel.
When we sin against or in front of our children, our calling is not to try to cover our own sins, but to run to the only One who can cover our sin. Our calling is to repent and believe the gospel. That our sins were committed against or in front of our children changes nothing. Well, almost nothing. It is the glory of the gospel that our sins can be forgiven. All of them. This is the good news. But it is likewise a grand blessing to be able to model before our children what repentance looks like. When we repent to our children we are not only affirming what they already know, that we are sinners, but we are showing them how we all must deal with this reality. We are acting in light of God’s grace, and being a means of grace in the lives of our children. We are teaching them that sin isn’t the exclusive province of children. We are teaching them that we recognize that they too bear God’s image, and so can be sinned against. We are showing them how a Christian household operates. We do sin against each other, but we are quick to forgive each other as well.
When we repent to our children we ought to do so in much the same way we repent to our Father. That is, we ought to leave our excuses behind. We ought to confess that we committed the sin because we’re sinners. “I’m sorry I shouted at you when you spilled your milk, but it just drives me crazy how you’re not careful with your milk” isn’t repentance, but blame shifting in a pious disguise. Do not be afraid. Your children may indeed look down on you. But they should, when you are down on your knees confessing before your Father. It is a cliché because it is true, that kneeling before the Lord in prayer is the very height of the position of power. Repentance has changed the world. Surely it can change our homes.