Thesis 75- We Must Wash Our Wives in the Word
How easy it is to be shocked at the wrong thing. Ephesians chapter 5 brings us a frightening analogy. Paul tells us that the relationship between a husband and wife is akin to the relationship between Jesus and the church. I know it’s frightening that in this text wives are called to submit to their own husbands. What is more frightening, however, is the call on the husbands. We are commanded to love our wives just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. (Ephesians 5:25)
We’re supposed to die for our wives, to lay down our lives for them as Christ did for us. That, however, as shocking as it may be, is still not the most shocking thing in this chapter. Paul goes on to describe something even more scary about this relationship-
that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; (26-28).
Jesus is about the business of washing His bride. We husbands are supposed to be doing the same. Our tool is the Word of God. We, like the prophets of old, bring God’s Word to bear. How do we do so? We start with ourselves. When we are unwashed our attempts to cleanse just make things worse. We need to bathe in God’s Word, to continuously scrub away, by His Spirit, every blot and blemish. We lead by example, acknowledging our dependence on His grace. There are precious things more powerful in leading anyone under our care into greater obedience than for us to grow into greater obedience and for us to repent for our failures.
Which makes it all the more scary. We ought to know just how far we have to go. We don’t feel qualified, equipped. We instead feel terrified and overwhelmed. We feel failure breathing down our neck, our conscience and the devil together reminding us of just how far we have to go. All of which is destined to wash from our selves the stain of self-reliance. The most important thing we can do in taking up this God-given call, is to pray for strength, wisdom, perseverance, insight, faith. We husbands are to go the church’s Husband and ask Him to wash from us our fear and our failure.
We are, in short, to repent and believe the gospel. We are to turn from our sin, affirm our dependence on His grace, and believe in the sufficiency of His provision. The solution to our failures as husbands is the success of the church’s Husband. Reformation comes as the bride of Christ submits to the ongoing work of her Husband. Part of that is husbands following in His path. More of that is husbands looking to His cross and leading our joint heirs of His grace there.