It is no wonder that in a world that argues that all language is a power play we are always on high alert for verbal offenses. Nor is it any wonder that in a world populated by sinners like us we would often find offenses where there were none to be found. And in a world that affirms we each make up our own reality, it seems plausible that any offense taken must have been an offense given.
But it’s not. All language is not a power play. And if you argue that it is, I’ll just wonder what angle you are playing, and have no reason to even hear your argument. Language, rightly used, is a tool of communication, a tool to bring people together. For it to work it must involve, one way or another, a shared language with shared meanings. Given that our Lord is the Word incarnate, that our Father spoke the world into existence, suddenly words are less weapons (though they can be) and more sacraments.
Nor is it true, that is to say, corresponding to reality, that we all make our own reality. Reality is apart from us, outside of us, independent of us. Which means that not every offense taken is an offense given. Our duty, before taking offense, is to ascertain if there is an offense there to be taken.
Consider one of my favorite accounts from the book of Joshua. Chapter 22 finds the two and a half tribes that have settled on the east side of the Jordan setting up an altar. The rest of the tribes muster an army to destroy what they perceive to be their wayward brothers. How dare they set up an alternate place of sacrifice? When the soldiers arrive, however, they discover that the intent of the message of the altar was the precise opposite of how it was taken. These tribes set up the altar not to make sacrifices to a different god from their brothers, but as a memorial to their brothers that they worship the same God. Once this misunderstanding in untangled, peace breaks out. And there was much rejoicing.
Paul tells us in I Corinthians 13:5 that love is not easily provoked. As we enter into conversation we come from a posture of peace, with a perspective of peace. We are open and vulnerable rather than prickly and defensive. We are not quick to employ sarcasm in our own defense. We have here another opportunity to push back against the spirit of the age, to win battles without firing shots simply by not hiding in our emotional bunker. We have an opportunity to shine gospel light into the darkness of a world gone mad simply by being slow to become mad, slow to speak and quick to listen.
The message we bear, of the cross of Christ, brings with it its own offense. Let us not add to it being easily offended.