The Two Shall Become One

Six years ago today Lisa became my bride, and I her husband. For all the cultural confusion about marriage, for all the dishonor we give the institution, treating it as a revolving door, the reality is the reality. Before the God of heaven and earth, as He ordained from before all time, we made our vows, and we were made one flesh. Six years later that is still what we are, one flesh.

It is not, however, just the sexually confused that fail to grasp the astonishing nature of marriage. Hundreds of years ago our forefathers saw marriage as little more than a business venture. For the last few centuries our forefathers have seen marriage as a depository of love and romance. A pox on both their houses. I am all in favor of the family economy. When we married Lisa and I actually included the economic circumstances we brought to our marriage in our wedding vows. We both committed to this economic arrangement, “With all my earthly goods I thee endow.” I’m also a strong proponent of love and romance. Which is why I vowed to love and cherish Lisa.

That said, both views fail to get to the core of what marriage is. Like trinitarian views that zero in on attributes and callings but miss the unity and relationship, too often we miss the earth shattering reality of two becoming one flesh. We miss the covenant of marriage for the trees of the work and love of marriage. God says that in marriage the two become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). Not that the two are very close. Not that they have shared economic interests or that they share their feelings with each other. One flesh.

That means I cannot serve me without serving her. I cannot hate her and love myself. I cannot allow anything to come between us. My loyalty is to us. My calling is to protect and nurture us. My wife, my Eve, is the garden I’m commanded to dress and to keep. And it has been my privilege to do just that. It has been my blessing to have Lisa as bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. I have, in being one with Lisa become more myself. We have together become more like Jesus, the husband of us all. He is the third cord that binds us together, Him whom I daily thank for blessing me with Lisa. And the Sower leads us…